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Tales of the salesman
#21
Blind faith in "The System" is one of my pet hates.

A couple of years ago I went to the local Jewson branch and asked if they had a particular hinge in stock. "Nah, mate. none of them".

As I walked away from the counter, I spotted several packs on the rack, so I picked up a couple and returned to the helpful salesman. He grudgingly scanned the barcode: "Nah, we don't stock those". I pointed out that he had one in his hand. "Not on the computer" was the reply. I asked whether I could buy them anyway. "Nah. Sorry mate. Not on the system. Can't let you have them" Aaaarrrgh!!!
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#22
Back in the 1970s I had a Peugeot 504 Estate which regularly went to the Peugeot dealer for service. Since that was the only garage I needed to use in the ordinary way I took my Ruby for MOT there. When I went to collect it I was told it had failed on chassis rot, so I asked to be shown the problem. The car was put on the ramp and the mechanic pointed to some small holes in the bottom of the body side where the running board fixes. I pointed out that the chassis was the substantial 'A' frame which we all know, and he was looking at something non-structural. The response was 'It's chassis as far as I am concerned'. I was not allowed to leave until I had paid for the failure, so that night I got welding, and returned the next day to get the re-test for free.
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#23
I phoned my local motor factors to ask what they sold WD40 for, the salesman said 'because people want to buy it, !!!
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#24
Martin. That is quite ridiculous!

Personally I would have put the cash on the counter, put them in my pocket... and walked out of the shop. !
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#25
No! if they're not on the computer they don't exist so they wouldn't be missed if you just took them...
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#26
1972 and the 50th Austin 7 Anniversary Lands End to John O'Groats run. Returning south in Type 65 fitted with not-very-well-aligned 1930 Chummy engine (fitted at the halfway mark going north), the fabric joint running well out of line, quite rightly cried enough. Not having a spare, my wife was instructed to proceed south towards Glasgow and enquire at every garage if they happened to have the part - this was a long shot of course, but all we could do. Twenty minutes later she back, the very first garage had one hanging on a nail behind the counter.
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#27
“They’re not on the computer. That’s the Staff Christmas Party tin over there.”
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#28
Martin's experience echos my own in a large branch of a builder's merchants. I asked if they had a door in stock, 'no' was the reply, why not I asked 'because people would want to buy them!'

Confused of Staffordshire.
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#29
Another favourite of mine is being told the "there's no call for them". Well I'm bloody well calling for one!!!
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#30
Worse, “there’s no call for them, you’re the sixth person today that’s asked”. ( note : I know that’s grammatically incorrect but the storekeeper didn’t )
Alan Fairless
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